LiL SNOWMAN
smiley/ sunshine ;
27th March 91
Loves:
her family; smelly monster; Lil monsters; darlie; algae twinny; carrot; Elite; dodo; Meesiam clique; Lei Lei; mizi and gang =D; Fatchiek; choclit; 2 grass; weena =D ;EOM; eLeven and her other pillars of strength =))
Life's simple happiness♥ .
Wish upon a fairy..
[ ]doctors without borders
[ ]love ones to be blissful
[ ]my smellymonster to be healthy:)
[ ]African kids to be healthy
[ ]world peace
[ ]everlasting simplehappiness:)
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Tuesday, August 30, 2005,
♥ 10:17 PM
very very tired.tired of walking on.
tired.
tired of faces
tired of reality
tired of emotions
tired of starin blankly
tired of explaining
tired of remembering
tired of enduring
tired of people
tired of myself
tired of having hopes
tired of stayin awake when i'm not
tired of smiling
tired of crying
tired of speech
tired of looking
tired of understanding
tired of wondering
tired of asking
tired of waiting without outcomes
tired of thinking
tired of being unable to fly
tired of disappointment
tired of heartaches
tired of time
tired of days
tired of being tired
i am really tired of life.
but wad else can i do?
♥ 10:03 PM
ehh.last day of common test.whee~ finish lit paper n left onli half a min.so henngg.den went soccer.WHEE~haha. kinda fun bahs. but a lil hot. yeahs.jus fun. need not explain.hee.the question made me dumbstruck.
i couldnt explain myself
my mind went blank
i realise,
dey were right.
if onli time can backflow. i swear. i'll nv have made tt move.
Saturday, August 27, 2005,
♥ 1:49 PM
WHEE!!yesterday was fun. hmms. went to bugis wif jiahui,wen to the temple there 1st den went to shopp! hehe. hmms.bugis there got a lot ppl v.poor thing de. yeahs.an old lady asked us to buy some tissue from her cos she onli got an eye. so we did n nv take de change back lo. poor thing lei. wonder if she got children not. dey should take care of her lo.if they dun then dey're really useless. yeahs. hmms. den dunnoe lo. v.crowded.squeezing ppl like siao.ha.not tt bad. aggerating onli. hee. hmm.dens had fun lo.saw vince. vincy vincy mus take care hor.hee.smiles for u. hmm.den went to buy some things n take 960 back. hmm.we sat at the last row.so fun.haha.cos a mini size''table''den we tou tou put our drinks there.like pinic man.haha.laugh llik siao when de person's phone got the ringtone v.loud lo. n we mimic mr bean.hahhass.fun
den i met bell at fajar there.hehee.we went to play again! bought 3 ice cream cones each .hahaha. walk a few steps already start melting le.den we sat under the tree opp bb court n EAT! hahaa. but v.diff.den our hands,legs,shorts all kana hit by ice cream.den rite! we asked a lil girl who walked past us if she wan ice cream,hahaha.she so shocked n her granny laughed.hehe! den rite. an aunty walked past us n she say''wah! u all so kiasu arh!''hahaha. den we roar into lauighters lo. real chaotic.hhaha.den rite.bell is sooo funny! becos she got ice cream all over her face!hahaha. i laugh when she got them on her chin n cheeks!hahaa.she told me not to laugh at her but i nv listen.!!=pphees! hmms. den got once a stupid fly flew into my ice cream! den cannot eat le! so sad.! haha.den when it flew rite.we all like shout at it lo.haha.but it didnt fly away immediealty.den got another fly stucked inside.eewwww!! den all the ice cream drip on the floor.haha.once more worst. bell wanted to push de ice cream cone out rite,den it didnt come out lei!! hahaha.noe y? becos her finger went through it!! hahaa.starting i still dunnoe wad she talking abt lo.den when i saw her finger wriggling den i laugh untill peng!!! hahaha.so funny lo. den we add alot of mnm inside de ice cream.hhaa.wanted to do jiao bei jiu but our hands too short so cannot lo.hahaha.eat all finish le went to fajar wash hands den went back to the grass hill near bb court.haha. den rite. when walking ,i told bell tt last time i small like to use the mnm red colour choco to apply as lipstick mah.den rite. we decided to play tt! haha.so we were like facing the reflection on the kindergarden window n laughing lo.looks so stupid but fun!haha.so we apply orange! but not obvious so we put blue n we look like we've got poisoned or smth.hahaha.fun fun!! dne we take pics n sit on the grass!! hehehe. took many pics. hahaha. i like! hehe! den we watched de world goes round n we watched pink clouds wif blue skies. so nice.but got more nicer de compare to yest! hehe.jus fun la.hehe.
so today went to plaza.saw chris n benjamin.wheeee~=))
happy happy.sha lalala.
dun feel liek revising though. feel tired when revision comes into my head. yucks.
Friday, August 26, 2005,
♥ 5:43 PM
boring day at co. but yesterday pe was fun!! ahahah!! noe y! cos rite. we suppose to ran 3.2 mah. den rite. we start walking. liek big walk like tt!! hahaha. all the girls n fairul,mizi n aidil!! hehe.den while others ran a big round,we see nobody see us rite,we take short cut!!!den we ran up de stairs n cut through de way n reach the oppsite side through de buildings! hahaha!!! den we all pretend we running! den when we see de 2/3 teacher in front rite, we all pretend to jog n pretend to pant lo! den the teacher praise us lei! she say we v.gd! mus keep it up!! hahaa.!! she though we really run tt fast lo!den when we reach de traffic light rite, den saw our pe teacher den we pretend to jog n jog.hahaha.n she praised us too!! oh man!! roar into laughters lo!hahaha.jus so fun.den suppose to run to de -park,den all of us walk halfway den see those benjamin (chua) n alan turning back,so halfway we cheer for them n haven reach de 1/2 of the park we make U-turn n went back to sch.hahaha.so funn lo.should i or should i not?
will u even appreciate?
life moves on and so should we_adapted from who move my cheese for teens. wad a meaningful sentence lo.
when life stops and u're stuck halfway, do not stop, u gotta walk on and on in order to find de way out. light might not always travel in straight lines someday.who noes? from me!A-HAHAHA
Monday, August 22, 2005,
♥ 2:50 PM
sha lala. ncie day. just keep laughing. hehe. jessie lo. haha. esp tt wo bi ni duo tt part!! haha she keep repeating den i say next time her son is called billy toh!!!hahahas! whee. yups. nice walk wif imah. hehe!smiles n smiles. tml is history common test le!! mus chiong arhs!!!!=DdDdDyao wei ai yong gan yi ci!!! big smiles!! A-hahaha. hahs.
if u nv dare to face ur feelings
den u should now
make this time,
jus an exception
=))
strive for happiness! A-hahah!
smiillleeesss!!!!!
hahas. wad a stupid mission.!! hahahhaa. cool coollll! n i'll nv foret wad nelson say to me today abt the choco! hehe! jessie noes wad! ha=pp
its so ncie to be happy~ sha lalalalala
Sunday, August 21, 2005,
♥ 2:53 PM
okie day. tied my shoelaces wif kristy. those stupid 2/3 guys keep making us. oh mans. ha. lucky nv fall. but i promise i will nv play this again. n jessie just wont agree in tying hers to ours. hee.empty spaces
in a half-awake world.
i pray
to go back
like wad we used to be.
i pray hard
Saturday, August 20, 2005,
♥ 11:32 PM
i told myself not to be stupid.things were nv meant to be;;
♥ 11:23 PM
nice day with bell n angela. hehe.angela v. funny lo. cute!! haha. rmb at the delifrance thingy i n bell were like using the plate to 'sweep' the table lo. den she say'aiya! like tt can le mah'' haha.den she jus use her hand n one sweep it went to de ground.haha.we still there slowly sweep . n at the mrt too. hahas. n our ballons! wanna get more next time. hehe.den after tt angela went for tuition n bell n i went to fajar.hehe. brough 2 bottles, 1 litres each. ehs. i ice lemon tea n 1 green tea. den we took so many many many straws n connect them to drink.haha.so fun lo. n took pics of it. hehe. n we even connect the straws so high tt we need to stand to drink.but v. diff to suck. heehs. den went under my blk n drink cos drizzle le. den the ice lemon tea over flow becos it fall twice! haha. n green tea over flow once too. haha.down bell's leg.muahaha. i'm so lucky! hehe. n she turned so sweet. den we went back to the fitness corner again. compete see who can drink tt appro. 1/2 of the 1 litre each! haha. n bell jus gulp all of them down within seconds when i'm lik slowly tasting it.haha. so punishment for me was to walk those massaging sharp stones. omg. climb onto de bars when bell dun let me pass n i land steeping hard on one of the stones.pain lo. hehe. nvm.somemore she go take my shoes n run away lo. heh. but she v.gd girl mahs..''gd girl'' haha.so she return me lo. den sit n see ppl play bb for a while n went home. nice day bahs. went to jog n had dinner at home. tt nurse show was nice.
Friday, August 19, 2005,
♥ 7:38 AM
hmm. jus another ordinary day. co was still okie. but kinda busy nowadays. sians lo. n wasnt really in de mood after chinese lessons. hmm.after recess was fun! ha. kristy n me tied both our shoe laces together. tt means she tie her shoes lace together, den me also. den when we walk rite! so fun lo. always almost trip but lucky nv.haha. imah held onto me!! thanks man. liew. she say i wan fall le still walk so fast.haha. no choice. later late for class.hee.n greg! thank u! hahs. for wadeva. i'm jus thank u k. hehs. rmb our smiley promise!=pp
i hate it. i cant deny how much i care .
ever since u took my heart away,
u nv return.
i'm all left with a dead heart. hollow.
y is it so difficult.
when i thought everything is over.
yet it jus appear out of nowhere
once again.
Tuesday, August 16, 2005,
♥ 11:05 PM
ehs. no comments for today.but i jus dun understand y ppl fight. shout here shout there. its not a nice scene.staring into space. n i understand nth last forever.
Monday, August 15, 2005,
♥ 9:46 PM
hmms.today after sch went to soccer wif melvin dey all lo. kinda fun. had a nicey chat wif jessie. yeahs. we talked almost abt everything n we jus watched the world goes round. 1 word to describe every moment i have when watching them play soccer. PEACEFUL. yeahs. when i watched them,everything is jus so right. everything is so calming. n i seem to have forget all the troubles.all stress. all wadeva unhappy shit. everything is so wonderful. but happy times doesnt last long. the y past soon.so after tt went home at around 6 lo. hmm.dunno. seem to be feeling a lil down after wards. yeahh. n junxiang was so funny. he wanted us to help him buy drinks. n i n jessie were like looking at him den he look at us smiling asking us to buy,but when he saw us looking right at him,he like got shock den v.funny lo.at 1st he was asking us to buy for him den he suddenly say''oh.er....nvm la.''haha. so funny lo.cos i think he thought we angry or smth bah.but we werent lo.yeahs...hmms.have i really got over.
i couldnt help but keep asking myself.
if i have, den y am i feeling like tt?
i seem to be feeling somekind of heartache. but i got no idea y am i having it. i dunno y.
i miss de times we once have.
if i had, it had been a year...
Saturday, August 13, 2005,
♥ 10:33 PM
hmm. yest night bout 11 like tt, i was staring out of my window n looking at de dark sky. many stars but cloudy. actually i was looking for meteors. sis say yest night will have meteor shower, cos she in astronomy club. but i guess it was too cloudy tts y diff to see. so in de end i see for 45 min n went to bed le. den aft tt. mid night 2am + i slept in younger sis; room mahs,dad thought i was out n called my phone.haha.so funny. den tell him i was in sis's room lo. den went out to de balcony to look out of the sky again.abt near 3am time bahs. den it was much much mmore cloudy. so decided to give up n went to bed.morning was boring. night went to celebrate bro's birthday wif grandparents n aunt n her bf!hehe.interesting.
yums. de ice cream cake was nice
Friday, August 12, 2005,
♥ 10:45 PM
WHEE~ hehe. played soccer today with melvin,ben chua dey all which was great fun!!sha lala.hehe.went for lunch wif jahui n jessie 1st den went for soccer.muahaha.de best time. yups.
hee. den jessie n jiahui didnt join those kicking de ball thingy.haha. so i play penalty n some passing with jieren n chorchuan.hehe.his name? haha.yeah.should be. n tt 2 little boy boys! who call me aunty n xiao mei mei. wah liew.haha.but they r really cute lo. haha. currently still in pri de.mus work hard! dey kinda sensible i find.hehe. n at least i managed to goal 1 penalty when jieren was de goalkeeper!! becos he was ready yet.muahaha. nvm nvm. goalkeeper mus be alert de mah.haha. hmms. den de balls went into de drains loads of time. pro lo.norman actually jus jump down n take.OMG!haha.yeahs.hmms.
den dey played matches n we watched lo? haha. fun. den try to kick away norman's soccer ball he was kicking. den always cannot. turn here turn there. can faint lo.hahas! one day i can also!!muahaha. soccer is de best mans!
hmm. n i spend a lot of energy asking whys. MANY MANY WHYS. i also dunnoe. i jus cant stop asking. hehe. i'm sry guys! hehe! wan me to stop mus jus listen on n on until i'm tired lo.hehe.
hmms.sometimes tt just isnt love . is it?
Thursday, August 11, 2005,
♥ 4:42 PM
walk home with jessie todays. ha. went bonkers becos our springs came off. yeahs. jus so funny lo. laugh here laugh there. untill our teeths also drop out. den walk home myself from the park.hmms.melvins stay healthy kks.heehad this damn freaky nightmare yesterday night. its de worst among all de nightmares i had before. this , i swear is de most horifying i've ever come across.
seeing u kills me. how stupid can i get?
Tuesday, August 09, 2005,
♥ 11:20 PM
hmms~ went to see chocolate fac with girl girl today. fun.ha. talking craps with her.yums~ double chocolate at mcCafe was nice.hehe.hmms. de moive was okie lo. still okies bahs. yeah.hmm. dens after tt rush home see ndp le lo. paretns n sis went to padang to see ndp. hopefully dey enjoyed it? hahas. ccks ppl u rules man. excellent show u all put up! best among all! hee.hmms.die le lo. had no idea how to work on ipw stff when everything seems to be rushed. aww. wadevas.
Monday, August 08, 2005,
♥ 7:30 PM
whee~ wentt to de playgrd with sis. saw both of her lil friends. omg. so damn cutie!!! zara was so sweet n she was like singing n jumping abt.haha. de other boy was like so cute!! when he smile.hahaha. n he seems to be in love with another kid,dunnoe girl or boy de.omg! dey v.v.v.v cute lo!p.s!! chelsea won arsenal!! hehe! score is 2:1.whee!
as de wind blew past,
i wonder,
will i regret the decision made?
have i really put u down?
or issit jus wad i used to thought,
tt i have long forget u
but didnt?
i dunnoe
Sunday, August 07, 2005,
♥ 12:56 PM
nice day lo.celebrate my 40th b'day.hee.no la. s'pore's hmm.fun lo.sing loud loud but was so damn hot. hehe. walked n drenched in de rain.fun. change a blog backgrd n i wrote my own poem at the 1st page.hehe. hopes its nice lo.WHEE~Saturday, August 06, 2005,
♥ 1:03 AM
watch my sassy girlfriend vcd with sis today.nice thouching funny show.n finsih reading chinese cinderella n the secret dragon society le.still kinda okies bahs.hmms.seems to notice how much i have changed since last year.i read my previous post i made last years.wad a big difference there is in me n my surroundings. how fast ppl changed.although dey may be jus by ur side. how fast i grow in my thoughts, how fast i changed my point of view in life. how fast...
couldnt help but admit tt i seemed to be much happier when i was in de past compared to now. cant deny somethings. but issit a regret? i mean, last time i seem to be those so cheerful,jumping here n there, an exaggerating girl,tt always believes tt good begets good. tt believes tt everyday is full of surprises for us to look for.but now. i'm using live a day as it passes attitude to live my live. saying abt my life.maybe i'm jus living it becos i've been apointed by someone in heaven to do so.or perphaps i'm merely living live for the sake of living. last time i could have spends hours rattling on,saying bout positive things abt life. but now. i would say de reverse,although i dun cover some beautiful things tt had once happened. but there r still many things i dun understand. n seem nv to understand. poerphaps u're not me. so u wont understand.how can i explain? the life i'm living now seems so colourful,but issit actually plain emptiness deep inside? i dunnoe. n i wonder wad wil happen if oneday i were to discover theres onli emptiness n darkneess? n tt actuall colours were merely a decoration. i noe things doesnt last forever. at the saem times. i couldnt help but find earth ugly at times. i dun say it but its really how i'm thinking. i sick n tired of feeling sad. i 'm sick n tired of being wronged n having the need to explain myself.i sick n tired of hearing excuses.i'm sick n tired of hearing how much one hates me.i'm sick n tired of looking through fake faces.i'm sick n tired of acting.i'm sick n tired of having being 2 sided. i'm sick n tired of wad i am seeing everyday,which is nth but another day of repeatition.i'm sick of ppl thinking they noe me. sometiems i'm even sick of ppl caring for me. i'm selfish buit sometimes i hopes to be alone. yet i hates lonliness.n i'm so sick of contradictors.
sometimes i look back into de past. n realise life was nice untill things happen,ppl appears. dey took away my happiness n stepped onto it untill it shattered n nth came back. dey treat it as nth has happen.becos dey didnt even cared how i would feel. maybe things wouldnt have changed if it wasnt for them. i dununderstand.cant dey let me live my life?de way i wanted to? y mus dey make things complicated when everything is actually v.simple?y issit some ppl r always putting themselves 1st, thinking abt their benefits n nv thinking for others. i dun understand. although i dun tell them,i find them jus as selfish.maybe afterall nth has changed. its merely time for me to wake from the beautiful dream i thought i had own. maybe this is reality after all.